Paranoia - Constant Vigilance
by Cissa-Lycoris-Black
Summary: This idea was given to me by Slytherin66. I hope I pulled off Mad-Eye to your satisfaction. One-Shot. A sort of sequel to 'Scare a Lunatic. Lose your Life.'


Thank You so much to Slytherin66 for giving me this brilliant idea! I hope you enjoy this as much as you did 'Scare a Lunatic. Lose your Life.'

I'm really hoping that this is good; it's very hard to get into Moody's way of thinking.

Paranoia

Constant Vigilance

Two lone figures wearing black robes and black travelling cloaks walked through the small suburb that housed many Muggle families. Walking in the shadows of a two story townhouse they silently crept up to the picket fence.

To any Muggle they would've looked ridiculous as they pulled out two thin sticks from their pockets, but they weren't sticks, they were in actual fact wands, wands that belonged to one Rabastan Lestrange and one Lucius Malfoy.

Not many knew of the location of our famed paranoid ex-Auror, Alastor 'Mad-Eye' Moody. Those who did knew that when it came to protection Moody was famed for his rather irrational traps. Of course, Lucius was very surprised when he and Rabastan made it across the picket fence with no problems. There were two other Death Eaters that were to go through the fence first to make sure that there weren't any booby traps.

Avery and Nott walked through the small gate of the picket fence, each letting out a sigh of relief when nothing happened, that is until Avery made the mistake of standing on a hidden garden rake. The rake hit him dead between the eyes and caused the man to fall over and into a magically hidden pool of slime that turned out to be acid.

Starting to yell Lucius quickly silenced him with a silencing charm. Avery was splashing about, but nothing was heard. Nott on the other hand had started for the front door before a Muggle trash can jumped out of its hiding place and started biting his leg, Lucius tried not to laugh at the absurdity of it all. Leave it to Mad-Eye to think of using Muggle items as protection.

As Nott tried in vain to swing the trash can away from him another item came screaming across the lawn this time it was an old hand-held lawnmower, it was on a straight path towards Nott's other leg. Rabastan by now was clutching his stomach as he laughed quietly along with Lucius. Not seconds after the mower came whizzing past them, yet another contraption joined in the fray. It was broom and it was intent on knocking Nott unconscious, as it hit him in the backside, he turned and gave the trash can a well aimed kick dislodging it from his foot.

Bending over to grab the trash can he hadn't thought of the possibilities that the thing would attack him again only this time it attached itself to his head. Rabastan by now was literally rolling on the floor as he and Lucius watched Nott running around the garden, a trash can on his head blocking his vision, a hand held lawnmower motoring around after him and a broom banging the side of the trash can. Eventually Nott tripped and collapsed in a heap, he'd given up fighting the contraptions.

Lucius and Rabastan finally made their way to the front door after helping Nott out with his new attachments. Finally free of the damnable Muggle objects he, Lucius and Rabastan entered the house as quietly as possible.

Of course unbeknownst to the three Death Eaters, Moody had even rigged his house up so that should an uninvited 'guest' enter his home the objects that were enchanted were set to attack mode.

Nott made yet another error in judgment and walked into the kitchen while Lucius and Rabastan went up the stairs. Walking across the landing, they found one door that had been left slightly ajar. The two men crept along the hallway as silently as possible and opened the door completely.

It was as unexpected as they could have ever imagined.

Down in the kitchen was Nott; the poor man had no idea as to what he had just gotten himself into, Nott had just lifted his wand up after casting a 'Lumos' to light the tip of it, he came face to face with a fridge, a shelf and whole lot of drawers.

Gulping he tried to dive out of the way of fruit, vegetables, cutlery and crockery. Taking a few hits to the head once again only this time it was a spoon that decided to whip him in the face for a few minutes, before he was attacked by the fridge itself.

The fridge had somehow managed to get onto the counter top and had then gone further by actually launching itself across the kitchen and straight onto Nott. The man let out a pained shout that was muffled as a washing cloth slithered its way into his mouth while a pot made itself at home on his head. His head then became a drum for all the spoons in the kitchen as they each took a turn to beat out a tune similar to an old Muggle rhyme by the name of 'Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star'

By now he had lost feeling in his legs where the lifeless fridge lay. He eventually gave up the fight when he could no longer hear anything besides the ringing in his ears.

Of course back upstairs Lucius and Rabastan had only just seen the thin wire that ran the length of the doorway, but it was too late, Lucius' foot had caught the wire and with that an almighty bang echoed around the street.

It wasn't until the door handle had made contact with the wall when the entire bedroom imploded; Lucius and Rabastan went sailing down toward the basement of the house where they met their impending doom.

Nott of course had stretched his hand out also triggering a hidden wire that made the house shudder; it was soon followed by a deafening explosion as the rest of the house went up in flames.

Before Rabastan closed his eyes for the last time, he had seen an extremely large gas canister roll across the basement floor and hit the already burning furnace, the result was instant.

* * *

~(HP)~

* * *

Standing just outside the property was one very smug; yet still paranoid Alastor 'Mad-Eye' Moody.

"Constant Vigilance" Was all he whispered before apparating away.


End file.
